WHAT TO REMEMBER!

Effective listening is not just hearing what the speaker's message, it is about understanding what the message is. Listening attentively, eliminate distraction, getting the important ideas are example of good listening habits.
To build powerful listening skills, remember this!

• Control external and internal distraction
• Become actively involved
• Separate facts form opinions
• Identify important facts
• Avoid interrupting
• Ask questions
• Paraphrase the message
• Use lag time
• Take notes of important points
• Be aware of gender differences

A good listener will gain: RESPECT, AIRTIME, INFORMATION, BETTER RELATIONSHIP, GREAT CLARITY AND INCREASED LIKABILITY. (see more information from the previous blog: Benefits of good listening)

Listening is very important because this is the way we learn. We learn from the information we gather by listening to the speaker. How well you do on something, shows how well you listen.
So, if you're the listener, give time the speakers to express their thoughts and ideas because they will most likely return the favour. You definitely like when people listen to you, so why not listening to others too.

TYPES OF LISTENING

INFORMATIVE LISTENING

Listener's main concern is to understand the message of the speaker. Most of the time, we use informative listening and that's how we learn. For example, at school we  listen to the lesson from the teacher, based on how well we learn, shows how well we listen. We also listen to rules and procedures in the workplace, having a good performance shows how good we listen. 

RELATIONSHIP LISTENING

Relationship listening is based on empathy.  This is where the speaker and listener have a relation, or acquaintance and the listener can empathize with the speaker's situation.  The emphasis of this type is understanding the speaker.

APPRECIATIVE LISTENING

Appreciative listening is purely the listener's choice. For example, listening to music for entertainment, to your choice of movies or shows, to speakers because you like their characteristics. 

CRITICAL LISTENING

Critical listening is based on logic.  It is the type of listening that is essential to democracy.  We listen to the speaker and criticize them based on the speaker's credibility, tendencies and logical decisions.

DISCRIMINATIVE LISTENING

It is the most important type of listening. It is the type of listening we use on a daily basis.  Our mind can listen for slight tone changes, body language and the speakers intentions that we can be unaware of.  It basically covers all areas of listening.  Informative listening will help listen to minute differences in meaning.  Through appreciative listening, the listener can learn certain things about themselves, such as, what kind of sounds or noises we find appealing.  Also with critical listening we are able to judge the speaker with greater accuracy, along with the message they are trying to deliver.

URL: http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/kline-listen/b10ch4.htm

LIST FOR IMPROVING LISTENING

• STOP TALKING - focusing on the speaker, not on what you have to say.

• WORK HARD AT LISTENING - Being involved in the conversation and prepare to learn something.

• BLOCK OUT COMPETING THOUGHTS - Avoid daydreaming during the lag time. Always focus on the speaker's message.

• CONTROL THE LISTENING ENVIRONMENT - Find an area where you won't be distracted by something around you.

• MAINTAIN AN OPEN MIND - Give the speaker verbal and non-verbal feedback. Provide some positive comments and ask questions politely, this will encourage the speaker. 

• PARAPHRASE THE SPEAKER'S IDEAS -  Being able to repeat the speaker's message, identifying the main points and ideas.

• LISTEN BETWEEN THE LINES - Identify what is really being said by observing the speaker's body language. 

• DISTINGUISH BETWEEN FACTS AND OPINIONS - Identify the difference between the facts and opinions of the message.

• CAPITALIZE LAG TIME - Use the lag time to identify, organize and review the message.

• USE MEMORY DEVICES - using acronyms, rhymes and links will help you remember important information.

• TAKE SELECTIVE NOTES - Writing down any important points, ideas and information. This will help you later on. You can review the important data and what you learned from the message. 

Take time to read this list. You can refer to it as you do the work (improving your listening skills). You can use this as a check list and mark the ones you have done so far. 

HOW IMPORTANT IS LISTENING

In my opinion, listening is very important when communicating to people. This is the way we adapt information or ideas, therefore this is how we learn. Being attentive in a conversation will help you understand the message clearly. In a workplace, listening is the key to perform well. Having good listening skills will help you build respect, trust and better relationship with other people. Based on my own experience, I perform better work when I give full attention to the speaker (managers, co-workers, and customers). Understanding the main ideas of the message can guide you on the job you have to perform and reducing any incidents, risks, misunderstanding or trouble. This is probably the reason I moved to a higher position in my workplace. It is really important to listen to the speaker’s message carefully because you don’t want miss any important points or ideas. When listening, it is definitely better to block any distraction around. Listening is how we reply back to the speaker silently. 

This is a video talking about how important it is to listen to someone's opinions or ideas especially in the workplace. It is like a reward to them when you take your time and listen to their thoughts or feelings.

BENEFITS OF GOOD LISTENING

These are some example of benefits of good listening

· RESPECT- Listening with paying full attention is communicating to speaker with respect. Giving respect to the speaker, you also receive theirs.

· AIRTIME- Understanding that there should be give and take in the conversation. Giving the time to listen to the speaker, they are most likely will do the same thing.

· INFORMATION- Listening is adapting new information, being attentive will help you more understand the person. The information may be important and may apply to your professional and personal life.

· INCREASED LIKABILITY- You notice that when you make a conversation, you like the people who listen to your words. It is the same thing when you listen to people, they like when you give attention to them.

· BETTER RELATIONSHIPS- Listening can improve your relationships with others. Being able to listen to other people`s concerns and problems without judgement.

· GREAT CLARITY- Listening carefully to the speaker will help you avoid any conflicts or misunderstanding.

In addition, I think listening can help you build confidence. You listen to get information, facts and ideas. Knowing the information and being able to repeat it or pass it to someone else is having that confidence to communicate to others.

Can you think of any benefits of good listening? Next time you have a conversation with someone and you are the listener, examine some of the benefits of listening.


URL: http://chloe-sekouri.suite101.com/six-benefits-of-good-listening-a291796

HOW DO YOU BUILD POWERFUL LISTENING SKILLS?

THE TEN KEYS...

1. CONTROL EXTERNAL AND INTERNAL DISTRACTION

• You listen better when you eliminate distraction. You should move to a place where you can hear the speaker clearly without any conflicting noises. Try to block out physical distractions. If there's any work or project that you have to do, put them aside for now. It is hard to listen and work at the same time. if you have any personal problems that affect your emotions, it is better to cancel any serious conversation because it's harder to focus on the speaker.

2. BECOME ACTIVELY INVOLVED

• When you listen to someone speaking to you, their body language and you body language are really important because it will help you understand what the message the speaker is trying to convey. Also, listening to the tone of the speaker will help you understand the implicit message.
• For example, maintaining eye contact will show the speaker that you involved and listening carefully to the conversation.

3. SEPARATE FACTS FROM OPINIONS

• A great listener will filter fact fro assertions and can easily identify credibility in a speaker just by comparing the facts and opinions on the topic.

4. IDENTIFY IMPORTANT FACTS

• Sometimes, speaker may include unrelated topic in the conversation. Your job is to figure out what is the main points and important facts

5. AVOID INTERRUPTING

• A good listener will let the speaker express their entire thought without interruption. Interruptions such as verbal and non-verbal (head movement, sighs etc.) are not only rude but also discouraging for the speaker. It is a common courtesy to let someone finish their thought before the listener speaks.

6. ASK CLARIFYING QUESTIONS

• Once the speaker has finished their thought, the listener gets their chance to ask questions. Avoid asking negative questions.

7. PARAPHRASE TO INCREASE UNDERSTANDING

• Being able to summarize what the speaker has said. This show that you understand the message and you are actually listening. Remember your job is to understand the material.

8. CAPITALIZE ON LAG TIME

• Always focus on the speaker. If you are waiting for the next point, don't waste your time. Instead, review the words/ideas of the message. To avoid getting distracted, you can try guessing what will be the speaker's next ideas. This will help you keep paying attention.

9. TAKE NOTES TO ENSURE RETENTION

• Some of us  may be good at remembering things, but you cannot always trust your memory. If you do not have any material to use to write down some points, make a mental note then write them down as soon as you can. Make sure that you understand what you are writing. Later on, you will realize how important it is to take note of something really important.

10. BE AWARE OF GENDER DIFFERENCES

• Men listen for facts, use interrupting behaviour to control conversation, less attentive and move around while listening.
• Women interrupt to communicate ideas and to get involved in the conversation. Women give steady eye contact, stay steady and more attentive than males.
• Knowing these tendencies will help you be more sensitive and informed listener.

These are helpful tools to improve your listening skills. You may be able to figure out what you have to improve by examining these points. Is there anything that you do or don't know from these lists that you think you need to do to help you build your listening skills?

I do know that some people take notes while listening. I don't do it that often, maybe that's the reason why I don't remember things after I listened.
I didn't know that you have to be aware of gender differences.

POOR VS. GOOD LISTENING

This is an example of poor and good listening habits. When you are listening, you definitely need to avoid distraction. Giving eye contact is a way of showing that you are paying attention to the speaker. Also, listen to the full message that the speaker is trying to deliver. Do not interupt during the conversation, this is the reason why you might miss out some important points. Giving full attention to the speaker will help you get all the main points from the material.

Do you really listen? Do you take important information and avoid getting distracted? Test yourself! Check what you need to do or not do while listening. This will help you figure out what you have to improve to be a better listener.