HOW DO YOU BUILD POWERFUL LISTENING SKILLS?

THE TEN KEYS...

1. CONTROL EXTERNAL AND INTERNAL DISTRACTION

• You listen better when you eliminate distraction. You should move to a place where you can hear the speaker clearly without any conflicting noises. Try to block out physical distractions. If there's any work or project that you have to do, put them aside for now. It is hard to listen and work at the same time. if you have any personal problems that affect your emotions, it is better to cancel any serious conversation because it's harder to focus on the speaker.

2. BECOME ACTIVELY INVOLVED

• When you listen to someone speaking to you, their body language and you body language are really important because it will help you understand what the message the speaker is trying to convey. Also, listening to the tone of the speaker will help you understand the implicit message.
• For example, maintaining eye contact will show the speaker that you involved and listening carefully to the conversation.

3. SEPARATE FACTS FROM OPINIONS

• A great listener will filter fact fro assertions and can easily identify credibility in a speaker just by comparing the facts and opinions on the topic.

4. IDENTIFY IMPORTANT FACTS

• Sometimes, speaker may include unrelated topic in the conversation. Your job is to figure out what is the main points and important facts

5. AVOID INTERRUPTING

• A good listener will let the speaker express their entire thought without interruption. Interruptions such as verbal and non-verbal (head movement, sighs etc.) are not only rude but also discouraging for the speaker. It is a common courtesy to let someone finish their thought before the listener speaks.

6. ASK CLARIFYING QUESTIONS

• Once the speaker has finished their thought, the listener gets their chance to ask questions. Avoid asking negative questions.

7. PARAPHRASE TO INCREASE UNDERSTANDING

• Being able to summarize what the speaker has said. This show that you understand the message and you are actually listening. Remember your job is to understand the material.

8. CAPITALIZE ON LAG TIME

• Always focus on the speaker. If you are waiting for the next point, don't waste your time. Instead, review the words/ideas of the message. To avoid getting distracted, you can try guessing what will be the speaker's next ideas. This will help you keep paying attention.

9. TAKE NOTES TO ENSURE RETENTION

• Some of us  may be good at remembering things, but you cannot always trust your memory. If you do not have any material to use to write down some points, make a mental note then write them down as soon as you can. Make sure that you understand what you are writing. Later on, you will realize how important it is to take note of something really important.

10. BE AWARE OF GENDER DIFFERENCES

• Men listen for facts, use interrupting behaviour to control conversation, less attentive and move around while listening.
• Women interrupt to communicate ideas and to get involved in the conversation. Women give steady eye contact, stay steady and more attentive than males.
• Knowing these tendencies will help you be more sensitive and informed listener.

These are helpful tools to improve your listening skills. You may be able to figure out what you have to improve by examining these points. Is there anything that you do or don't know from these lists that you think you need to do to help you build your listening skills?

I do know that some people take notes while listening. I don't do it that often, maybe that's the reason why I don't remember things after I listened.
I didn't know that you have to be aware of gender differences.